When I first wrote these books, I did not understand their impact on my life. The words came to me, or perhaps through me, but I did not feel the full weight of them. I understood them in my mind, but not in my body. I very much was that insecure, wounded little girl with a harsh inner critic who was hiding to stay safe. Who didn’t want to show anyone who she really was because she was terrified of being obliterated.
It’s only in the past two years, a time in which I have faced the most difficult moments of my life and gone through a painful season of personal growth, that I truly feel connected to these words that emerged years ago. Now I embody them. Now I embody the healing and transformation. And I do it every day. There’s no finish line. I always thought healing/transformation was a process with an ending. Like in a sci-fi movie where you step into a machine, someone presses a button, and suddenly you’re transformed. HAH. In real life, healing/transformation is an arduous, painful process. And it is for life.
My shadow self will be with me always. And in those moments when I feel the shame, doubt, fear, or insecurity, I go back to my words, and I remember to love myself even harder in those moments. It is my hope that these books offer you what you need in your moments of darkness.
